The good.. the bad.. the month in review

First I'm guessing you're wondering where I've been. (Or maybe you're not? Somehow that would be worse) Well, I had several life altering events in rapid succession these last few weeks and I'm just now getting my mind straightened out to the point where I can think. Let's start with the worst one and successive posts will move to happier topics, mmmkay?

November 12th was one crappy day. First, I started a new job. I was (in my own mind) so desperate for cash that I took the first thing I could get, which I was told was working as tech support on inbound calls for a reputable firm. My first day was going well - chit chatting with my new co workers, hanging out and generally trying to remember what this whole "going to work thing" was like.

That was when my fella showed up at work, face white, and my trainer called me out of class to tell me my father had just died.

I don't really remember much else of that day. It was a nightmare of crying, disbelief, and panic. No, my dad wasn't sick (at least not that we knew then) and in fact walked 3 miles a day and was generally considered one of those healthy, stubborn bastards :) Only 68, he had just retired and was settling into a well-deserved retirement after a lifetime of service. He helped the disabled and the poor my entire life as a social worker, and the number of lives he touched is impossible to guess.

Unfortunately that was the beginning of what I'm thinking of calling "my month of crap". Turns out he had no life insurance and although he had *some* money, he has left my mom with a pile of bills, problems and other difficulties which will literally take months to sort out. Worse still almost all that money was tied up in the stock market - great if you're an investment guru. He was, but none of us are. So many changes are going to be made to insure that Mom has some sort of stability in the months ahead.

Returning to my new job, I soon found out they had been less than honest with me regarding my job duties. I never took a single inbound call - instead the had me calling people to solicit donations. Yes, it IS as bad as you imagine. I was throwing up before work, sweating through the shift and hating myself every time I looked in the mirror. And it didn't even pay that much! Yesterday I finally snapped and quit, which means I am right back where I was before. Or am I?

Fact is, I have a small income stream right here. I do get paid to blog on occasion, and I could certainly be writing more than I did. Also I do consulting and after calling people to give to charity, I don't think calling small businesses and asking them to sit down and discuss building a website is nearly so terrifying as it was.

Hell, I have the perfect job - I get up, get some coffee and work from home doing things I really truly love. Of course, this whole experience has changed my attitude a bit. For one thing, starting right now, I pay myself first. If I had been doing that all along I probably wouldn't have needed a job and I could have been growing and really turning things around. Also, I really do view this as my JOB now - I get up at 8, get breakfast and get my butt in the chair to work from 9 until 6. No solitaire and no goofing off, instead a nice lunch break and me doing what I love the most every day. Who could ask for better than that? I don't really need to earn that much to replace the job I just left, and I know I can do it. Watch for more blogging from me - a LOT more - in the weeks ahead.

Until tomorrow - take care all :)